Saturday, October 15, 2005

itsy bitsy spider...

Inside my heart I carried a timeline―not from the past to the present but a knot where the future got tied up in it somewhere too. It throbbed with golden volts. Liquid knots lighting up at the slightest disturbance. Wet drops jammed on a freshly spun web. Microscopic images of neurons and synapses show how our brilliant brains transmit millions of thoughts through biochemical conductors, but I think the memories that flow through my heart run at a much higher current.

Triggered by eighties music or the smell of cheap carnations, the nodes on this silky grid light up like downtown Paris after a power failure.

Countless connections―places, people, pain.

Resurrecting recollections―delight, delusion, dread.

Were those relationships real? Did I dream up the intensities of those associations or did the idea of their existence just feed my adolescent addiction to recognition?

“Emotions―can I trust them?” Doctor Dobson asked.

“No! A thousand times no!” my cheated heart still responds.

A wicked spider wove this web; it trapped my soul and tricked my mind, bitter ancient poison drugged my innocence, alluring adventures tempted my fate as filthy fingernails began their tearing caress. But before I could fall, my true nakedness was gracefully rescued. In a strong single sweep came divine destruction of those sticky threads that clinged to my mistakes.

Destroyed in that moment―now cleansing tears drip down from the shattered webbing. Christening new hope of an old dream recaptured. Fresh rose petals shower down on a soft white dress and shining smiles. As two hearts believe in just One mind…beating together until the end of time.

No comments: